I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
