Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
