Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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