maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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