did you get engaged???
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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