Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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