We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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