He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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