what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
