I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
