awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
