apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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