butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
