i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
