You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
