Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
