I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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