remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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