What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize