the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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