don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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