Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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