She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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