i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I AM VODKA MAN
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize