a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
should my penis look like a turkey
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
