No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
