that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
