Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
