Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize