look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
