Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
