I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize