Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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