why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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