yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize