No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Panties = found
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
