Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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