Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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