Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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