Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
tell me about the fingering
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