i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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