Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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