I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
