my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
