dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize