I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
