wat bout pragnant strippers??
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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