Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
