My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
