omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
