Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
id be glad to
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
